Sunday, 11 December 2011

I officially hate Arthritis

Hate is a very strong word and i tend not to use it due to it's meaning, but today i am using it....
I HATE Arthritis, i really do..the pain and misery it has caused me and others i know over the past few days is horrendous. C has been to AnE today as she is really suffering with the pain and has nothing else to take to try and control the pain. How bad is that,??Too think that ontop of her 10+ tablets a day she is still in agonising pain, I hope the hospital help luvie and you are feeling a bit better soon..(((((X)))))
The thing is the tablets only take the edge away, it never completely removes the pain yesterday all in all i took 24 tablets aswell as smoothering myself in deepheat, that took the edge off and made it a bit more bearable, can you imagine the pain without any meds??? that wouldn't be worth thinking about..Today i was supposed to top up my weekly pill pot, but even that was too much effort and hurting my shoulders and neck, in the end i gave up.Trying to open the weetabix box and wrapper took what seemed like an eternity and i nearly gave up on that, i refused to ask scott, i wanted to do it myself.. Small things like that really take the pee when you are unable to do so, it is so frustrating..
Today i am angry, angry that arthritis has a hold of me and my life and is making me and others hurt the way it does..I really wish it could be operated on or given tablets to take it all away, unfortunately that is not possible.The tablets help with the pain and slow down the disease process, operations can help for time being but will probably need to be done at a later date..No miracle cure has been found and will probably won't be found while i am still around..
We are expected to just get on with it and deal with it, but i am telling you it's not always that easy, Yes today i am a little better than yesterday, not so tearful and feeling a bit stronger to try and fight back, but i know i have had a bad few days pain and suffering i have not had for a while and it has hit me hard. I do not think it is going to go away quickly and i may even ring doctors and speak about having another steroid injection as i know it has helped before, i just don't like having to rely on the steroids and if i can get by without i will, but i think i need to admit defeat and have that little boost to help me with this flare so i can feel more me again..

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